January 1, 2O23 

Josh,

I miss you. 

Every day. 

As I sit here,  the one-man-Captain of this vessel, I feel stuck and sometimes lost. 

I never imagined doing this without you. 

And then I ask myself what you would want me to do, and I feel less alone…

Maybe it’s my imagination, but I swear I can hear you giving me feedback, suggestions, and ideas.

You are with me, buddy, every step of the way.

The day after you died, we were supposed to preview the final film draft together, and it haunts me a little bit—or a lot—that you never got to see it.

I was really excited to show you the progress, and I know you were excited too.

You’ve been gone for about five months now, and it still hasn’t totally sunk in that you are gone; there are times I reach for my phone to ask you to look at a new logo design, or watch a new video episode for glitches or edits, or whip me up a melody demo... 

It’s weird not to have you as a sounding board, and it’s surreal not having you to create with.

I always valued your opinions, and you were always honest with your mind, and you TRUSTED.

My Gods, your capacity to trust the process, and me, was impeccable, and despite some worry, you stuck with it all through every step of the way—and THAT is a rare and beautiful thing…

[sits back, and sips his tea, mind trailing off…]

I’ve been spending time with your parents. 

They gifted me your famous hat and boots, the ones you wore in all of our pictures and videos.

I wore your boots, dude. 

You’ll never believe this… 

Get ready for it…

Santa gig!!

YES, I was Santa for exactly four days before the holidays, and I admit, it was fun and it paid!!

Talk about walking a mile in someone else's shoes.. 

Everytime I put those boots on, I truly felt your Holly-Jolly spirit, the redness of your smiling face, 

and I could feel your love of the season, so in a way, you were helping me conjure the Clause. 

You would have liked seeing me in that getup, I looked pretty good, but let’s be real, you would have done it better. 

Turns out we are the same shoe size. 

[Laughs, poignantly…]

The things you don’t know about someone…

In other realms of the Clark and Kobel universe, we have a website now!!

We knew this was going to be the next BIG thing, and here we are. 

Maevyn Stone, my wonderful partner, has been helping me build it with care and love.

She’s been an amazing person to discover new collaborations and creativity with – we share dreams the way you and I shared dreams, and that brings me deep comfort.

I don’t want it to sound like I’m giving you a Progress Report only,.. 

Business is a wonderful distraction from processing grief, isn’t it?

I’ll write again soon. 

Til then... 

Happy New Years, Josh

Onward and Upward….

JC